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2023

  • Commander

Competitive or Casual Commander? Debate Over Distinction Ended After Pod was Called “A Bunch of Fucking Nerds”

A heated discussion over the definitions of “casual” and “competitive” Commander was interrupted today after a bystander called the entire…

  • Magic: The Gathering

Jeweler’s Loupe a Great Accessory for Faking Ability to Identify Counterfeit Magic Cards

DENVER, Colo. — Local Magic: The Gathering enthusiast and collector Marvin Williamson has advice for anyone contemplating buying and selling…

  • Card Games

Opponent with Tiny Fence Around Playmat Astounded You’re Not Using a Tiny Fence Around Your Playmat

Local opponent who has finished erecting the tiny fence surrounding their playmat is astounded you’re not using a tiny fence…

  • Magic: The Gathering

Report: Blocker Doesn’t Want To Do The Math Either

The old Magic: The Gathering adage that ‘Math is for blockers’ is having its limits tested today. Sources confirmed that…

  • Commander

Ragebait Headline Think’s You’re Favorite Commander Sucks, You Suck for Playing It

Hey you. Yeah, you! Your favorite Commander sucks! Also, you suck for thinking you’re favorite commander is good. What kind…

  • Commander

Yeah, I’m a cEDH Player, as Long as the C Stands for Chumbawamba

ALLENTOWN, Pa. — Local Commander player Izabelle Zimmerman clarified today that the assumption she’s a competitive commander player is incorrect….

  • Magic: The Gathering

Local Man Who ‘Quit Magic: The Gathering Forever’ Spotted at Friday Night Magic

BURBANK, Calif. —A recent press release from Wizards of the Coast announced some decisions. As a result, Kyle Gaunt announced…

  • Card Games

Netdecker Caught Typing Blind Date’s Questions into Google

STOCKTON, Calif. — Notorious netdecker Chad Johnson was on a blind date with a friend of a friend Thursday. During…

  • Magic: The Gathering

Red Flag: He Chose to Use That Basic Land? Run, Girl

Basic lands are fundamental game pieces needed by almost any deck in every format. Though mechanically simple, the value of…

  • Magic: The Gathering

Wizards of the Coast Visited by the Ghosts of Beanie Babies Past, Present, and Future

Sources close to the company reported that Wizards of the Coast executives were visited by the ghosts of Beanie Babies…

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We have a bad case of the shirts.


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The Bored Card is unofficial Fan Content permitted under the Fan Content Policy. Not approved/endorsed by Wizards. Portions of the materials used are property of Wizards of the Coast. ©Wizards of the Coast LLC.
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